Friday, March 6, 2009

Laid Off

Wow. It has been 2 months since I lasted posted. I knew that it had been awhile, but didn't realize that it had been that long. The last couple of months have been tough for mostly unbloggable reasons.

Anway, I was laid off yesterday. They have decided to eliminate my position. I was not surprised that it happened & had been expecting to be let go. Ben & I had been talking about the possibility & were preparing for it to happen. Yet I was still surprised when it finally did.

The shock wore off at about 4 am this morning & I could not go back to sleep. I thought that I would be happy that I got laid off. But I'm not happy about it yet. Right now I am angry. I am angry that I worked for the last almost 2 years to improve the product for my company only to not be valued & let go. I went above & beyond what was asked of me. I improved the fit, quality and design of the product for a lower price. And yet it wasn't good enough for them & they let me go.

I chose to leave my job at my old company because there was no room for growth for me at the time. So I searched for a new job & was excited about the opportunity that I found. The company was profitable & growing with little to no debt. The dept I was hired for was expanding. My position would be a promotion. I would begin by setting up systems to help with the growth & then as we progressed, I would be able to have people under me. And I would be able to design again. And I would be learning & expanding the rest of my development skills. I would be learning more about costing & the numbers side. Maybe I was naive but the opportunity really seemed like a good one.

Well it turned out not to be. Obviously.


This is the first time in my life that I have not been employed by my choice. Every job that I have left was my choice. I have worked hard my entire life to make myself worth more to a company than what they pay me. It started in high school. I love working at the fabric store. I learned that by doing really well at my job that I was able to work whatever schedule I wanted. If I wanted to only work Sundays for 2 months so that I could to a play, they let me. If I wanted to take a month off so that I could study for my IB tests, they let me. I always got what I wanted because I was good at what I do.

And it has been that way ever since. I survived 3 rounds of layoffs at Nordstrom over the years that I was there. My bosses fought to keep me during every reorganization.

But I wasn't able to do this for this company. They did not see my worth. So I guess that it is a good thing I was laid off. I no longer have to commute 45 minutes each way to work. I now have the opportunity to re-focus my life. We have a plan in place. Hopefully here in a couple of days I will be happier about this unexpected change.

6 comments:

ellen said...

I think what you originally started doing at work shifted over time into a position were your talents weren't being used anymore. You are very talented and now you get to choose how to spend your time and use your talents...

Time for Susan to do things for Susan.

Sounds good to me. I can't wait to see what you do...

Anonymous said...

It was, for nearly 2 years, an opportunity to be better than they expected, even if they couldn't appreciate that in the end.

I, personally, really liked having you there for both professional and personal reasons. I'm sorry that doesn't amount to much as far as a paycheck is concerned. :)

beth said...

Oh Susan, I totally feel you. I remember being laid off of my dotcom job, and despite the fact that I had considered it a possibility, I was still shocked because I couldn't figure out why me? In the end, it's not you. It's accounting. And you, in the end, are better than any spreadsheet can say, which you of course already know. I, too, look forward to seeing what Susan being Susan results in. I hope you're still coming to the reunion, so we can talk about this over Margaritas. :)

Sophias Style said...

I'm so sorry to hear that...big changes like that are never easy. Keep hanging in there. I firmly believe all things happen for a reason.

Fort Collins real estate said...

It's the company's lost to let you go. I know it's hard at first but as time goes by you will eventually get used to it and move on. Life is not all about achievements, we have to experience things like this sometimes to teach us to be stronger and wiser. I know there are a lot of better opportunities out there for you.

Denver real estate said...

I am so sorry for what happened. Well, just think that it's not your lost but theirs because from the fact that you give your best to make them profit and you know that you're highly qualified to that position. Maybe they just don't see yet your contribution to their company but when time comes they'll realize it and you have to prove to them that you're their best asset. Denver real estate