Friday, March 30, 2007

A Small Rant

I am tired.

I am tired of worrying about my husband being sick. It's been 19 months of almost constant pain & worry. I want the doctors to understand the urgency & importance of how long this has been going on & figure out what is wrong. I'm not asking for a miracle cure; I know they don't exist. But is it too much to ask to know what is wrong after 19 months, 4 neurologists, 1 pain specialist & 1 neurosurgeon? Really is that too much?

I am tired of people treating me like I can not do anything at work. And yet I am the one they turn to when they have questions. If I am not good enough to do anything, why am I relied on to explain?

I am tired of being told that anyone can do my job. Or that they can learn to do any job there is. This is simply not true. Yes, you can learn how to use the programs I use. You can learn how to communicate changes with a factory. You can even learn how to sew & might even be able to learn how to make a pattern. But unless you are good at visualizing how a flat pattern shape is sewn together to make a garment. And can make it so that it fits. Then you can not do my job as well as I can. This is not a skill that you learn but part of my personality. It is just something I am able to do.

I am smart enough I could be a lawyer; I even took a PLR class & found it interesting. But I am not good at being able to stand up in front of people & speaking off the top of my head. So I wouldn't be a good lawyer. No one is good at everything. You may be good at everything you try, but you are not good at everything. So don't insult people by telling them you can do any job.

I am tired of working to make everyone's life easier, but not having the courtesy paid back to me. What's the point? I work harder to make your life easier, but what do you do for me?

So it isn't a small rant, more like a medium one. You is not directed at anyone in particular. So please do not take offense in reading.


ellen said...

I know I can't do your job! I can't even get flat quilts to do what I want them to do!

I am sorry you are having a hard time. You and Ben both deserve for the headaches to be gone. It's all too much.

Hey, maybe you should be a realtor too! Then you guys could work together and you can make swank clothes on the side! Then you can start flipping properties and make a killing! (ok, no more HGTV for me...)

Ben said...

I would love it if they could fix the headaches. I'm so TIRED of them. I know you are as sick of them as me. For the world to know, Susan has been nothing short of incredible in helping me when I need it, and being supportive and standing up to the doctors when I won't. I love her more than I could ever express!

Shawna said...

You are an amazing woman, Susan, never forget that! Sounds like things are a little rough right now, but know that even your old friend over here in Washington thinks of you often and knows you do YOUR job better than anyone else ever could :). I will keep Ben and his headaches in my thoughts and hope for it all to come to an end for both of you soon. Lots of love from Washington!